10 Of The Best Birds of a Feather Comebacks

The quips come thick and fast between the girls in Chigwell.

Birds of a Feather Comebacks

You always know when watching Sharon, Tracey and Dorien that there's going to be a lot of back-and-forth. Birds of a Feather wouldn't be the same without it.

The Comebacks...

  1. 1. Mum’s the word
    1. Mum’s the word

    Sharon: I don't want to end up a lonely dried up old prune like (looks at Dorien)...
    Dorien: If not having a baby is a crime against womanhood, Sharon, then so is not having a waist.

  2. 2. A geography lesson
    2. A geography lesson

    Sharon (stuffing her face with a chilli dog): Good honest English nosh.
    Tracey: Chilli dogs ain't English. Chilli's in South America.

  3. 3. Everybody needs good neighbours
    3. Everybody needs good neighbours

    Dorien (reacting to news the sisters are moving away): Why are you going?
    Sharon: I can't stand the neighbours.
    Dorien (glaring): Well that's two things you and I share. That and the waist sizes of Little and Large.

  4. 4. The dating game
    4. The dating game

    Sharon: I've virtually thrown myself at every decent looking man in a five mile radius. Barely half a dozen of 'em give me a second look.
    Tracey: And only then after you made a fuss of their guide dogs.

  5. 5. He’s just a big baby
    5. He’s just a big baby

    Dorien (giving financial advice): Go and see Jonathan, my accountant.
    Tracey: I'll see AN accountant, not your accountant. He's a pervert.
    Dorien: That's a little harsh.
    Tracey: You had him chained to your living room door naked except for a giant nappy.
    Dorien: Jonathan is a very bright and smart guy.
    Sharon (nodding): All his romper suits are Savile Row.

  6. 6. Ouch
    6. Ouch

    Sharon (to Dorien): There you are. Ever present. Like the fart that follows you into the car.

  7. 7. Close but no cigar
    7. Close but no cigar

    Garth (talking about his depressed jailbird dad): He hung onto the cigar cutter.
    Sharon: So?
    Garth: Well it's got a sharp blade hasn't it?
    Sharon: So what do you think he's gonna do with it, circumcise himself?

  8. 8. Aging disgracefully
    8. Aging disgracefully

    Dorien: When a woman reaches a certain age, she starts to notice certain changes in her body.
    Sharon: I know what you mean, Dor. One minute you're strolling along a moonlit beach arm in arm with some handsome young gigolo. Next minute you turn around and your bum's rubbed out both your footprints.

  9. 9. Forward the sisterhood
    9. Forward the sisterhood

    Dorien: We are all three of us emancipated! This is the perfect opportunity to celebrate our womanhood!
    Sharon (uncertain): Um... you don't want us to go out into the woods and talk about our periods, do you...?

  10. 10. That clears that up
    10. That clears that up

    Sharon (talking about Freudian slips): So if you mis-address a letter, it's never an accident?
    Dorien: So Freud contends.
    Sharon: Ah. That explains why I put the cheque for the gas in the envelope for the electric.
    Dorien: No that's not Freud, that's fraud.

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